Saturday, April 10, 2010

SON-OF-A-Bic!!!! *Mystery Solved*

I often times find that my pen-carrying technique of choice at the hospital makes for a lot of conversation with my patients and their families. Why this is, I do not know. People seem fascinated by it, when in all actuality--it's just a pen stuck in my hair. My method of carrying my pen in my hair has been something I've always done--from the time I was a Certified Nursing Assistant in the 1990's, through the pursuit of my geology degree at the University of Alaska Fairbanks, and it has continued on into my career as a registered nurse. Some of my favorite questions are, "SO I BET YOU NEVER LOSE YOUR PEN, EH?" or "HOW MANY TIMES HAVE YOU STABBED YOURSELF IN THE HEAD CARRYING YOUR PEN THAT WAY?" or "HAVE YOU EVER THOUGHT OF STICKING MORE THAN ONE IN THERE SO IT LOOKS LIKE AND INDIAN HEADDRESS?" or "WHAT DO YOU THINK THE BACK OF YOUR HEAD LOOKS LIKE IF YOU SHAVED OFF ALL YOUR HAIR?...DO YOU THINK IT'S ONE BIG BLACK INK SPOT?" (like I would ever even consider shaving my head to see if they are correct?). The last of these quotes is why I write this evening--indeed, the mystery has likely been solved as to why I am the way I am (i.e. goofy and crazy)...I have obviously absorbed way too much Bic pen ink through my skin and it's in very close proximity to my brain. This coupled with the fact that I am an obsessive pen-writer-on-my-hand kind of gal, too. I am always taking notes on myself at work. Blood sugar numbers, vital signs, doctor's orders--you name goes on my hand. I'm not a huge Sarah Palin fan but if she were here I would fist pump her on her choice to use the same method of writing down important information. God wouldn't have given us such a nice flat hand if He didn't want us to write on it. Long story short, I've estimated that my body absorbs at least the equivalent of 3 full Bic pen cartridges every year. Anybody with that much ink running through them is bound to be a little crazy, right? :)

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